Texas hold 'em and choke 'em!
I've finally been introduced to the parallel universe called poker, expecially the planet that calls itself Texas hold 'em. For years, I've resisted the advance of many poker-loving friends and relatives. Its not that I don't gamble. Ask the Vegas casino owners, and they'll assure you that c2c can brighten up a pretty ordinary day on the strip. I have donated plenty of money to the Blackjack table owers, dealers and waiters association of Vegas. However, poker is one card game I've always shied away from. It sounded unnaturally complicated for a cards game. To start with, you have to remember what all the piss pots, flushes, straights, full houses and royal flushes meant. On top of that, you have to get the order right. Granted, you can always have a cheat sheet and refer to it or ask your fellow poker players. But come on! Who's gonna respect a poker player who constantly keeps nagging you if a straight is better than a pair and a triplet?
Anyways, last weekend, my wife and I went camping with 3 friends from our gang. Unfortunately, one of them decided to bring along his poker set, and informed us that he was not going to let us sleep in peace in our tents unless we consent to learn and play poker with him. That's how it all started. As we picked up the nuances (read 'basic rules') of this game, we started getting into the spirit. Pairs elicited contented sighs while occasional straights were met with unabashed joy. As the sun disappeared and the camping ground was slowly getting enveloped in darkness, the stakes were getting upped at our table under a gas lantern. Fifty dollar chips were being thrown in nonchalantly. Granted, we just called the red chips 'fifty dollar chips', and we weren't really going to bring out any cash. But still, you could feel the sense of anticipation and thrill in the air. People started experimenting and finalizing on their poker expressions. I perfected the art of not letting away anything. When I got a good hand, I frowned. When I got a bad hand, I smiled. I was so unpredictable that it was enough to throw even experienced professionals off my scent. I'm not sure how I still lost so consistently. It was probably because I decided to show some style. Haven't you seen all those great poker scenes in moves where the protagonist is on his last dime and decides to bet everything he has on that last hand? The way the hero pushes the pile of chips saying "all in" must've made a serious impression on me. I've always wanted to do that. And here was my chance. Agreed, I only had a 5 pair, and there were bigger cards on the table. But the chance to be part of a 'movie moment' was too hard to resist and I did go all in. Unfortunately, my wife and poker-destroyer-in-chief was having an incredible run that night. She called my bluff pretty easily and added my measly donation to her considerable pile of chips. I would not want to get in the bad books of that woman when I' m sitting across from her on a poker table. She killed the competition that night, including that of our tutor ET.
When we came back from camping to resume our normal suburbian lives, I realized that the poker mania was here to stay. When we gathered at Ram's place on the eve of his b'day, we again decided to get a game of poker going. This time, my wife was in even better form. She was producing Aces and triplets like it was nobody's business. As for me, I couldn't seem to catch a break. I went maybe like 10 games without a half-decent hand. The only redeeming thing was that Ram went 'all in' this time and lost everything before me. On his b'day, no less. However, without the influence of alcohol (unlike the camping night), I actually got most of the rules straight. Like when I can 'check', how the bet matching works, what's a 'small blind' and a 'big blind' etc. (didn't I tell you its a complicated game?).
The following friday, we decided to have a formal poker night at my place. So we set the dining table up with enough seating space, stocked the fridge with enough alcohol to feed an army and opened the poker set for a night of gambling. We also had new arrivals, and we passed on our new-found knowledge of the game. There were a few hiccups before the game started. I was sitting on the floor with a bottle of beer talking to someone, and then I realized that our dog Oreo had spilled my beer bottle on the rug and had proceeded to lap up the contents with relish. And in a few minutes, the OH seemed to hit him. He looked totally out of it, roamed around drunk for a little bit and eventually just curled up under the poker table and went to sleep. We had to literally whack him over his head to wake him up next day morning. Not sure if he had a bad hangover, but he was not anywhere near his best the whole day. It goes without saying that my wife wasn't very happy with me. But the whole episode was hilarious, like something straight out of a comic book. Secretly, I was proud that Oreo infact liked beer. He was my boy after all :-)
Getting back to the game, there were experts and newbies fighting it out on the table. We decided to play with some money to make things interesting. Apparently, that's when people actually start using their brains, calculating odds etc. My wife, unfortunately, decided not to participate. My plans of getting back my $5 investment went down the drain. I played it safe knowing that every hand involved pennies, nickels, dimes and even a quarter or two. I didn't do anything flashy like going all in. It didn't matter. I got my ass whooped pretty quick. And before I knew it, I was the first one out of the game. Others followed. But the last 3 guys fought it out till 4AM despite my best attempts to kick them out of the house and get some sleep. Finally, the last 2 ended up splitting the handsome $30 pot.
That was last weekend. We haven't played poker since. I'm not sure where our gang will go from here as far as poker is concerned. Will we get bored of it and give it up just like we did other card/board games? Or will we get completely hooked on to it and make it a regular feature? I'm not sure. But I do know that we can't let the game can go on like that for hours. It becomes a torture especially for those who get kicked out early on in the game (ok, me). I'll probably vote to put in some sort of time limit, to make it fast and interesting. Also, I probably need to work on my poker expression and body language, seeing that whaterever I've done so far has not worked.
Ofcourse, the main thing to remember is this. Listen carefully because this is pretty deep. Poker is just like life. The wife is the boss and you are better off not messing with her.
Anyways, last weekend, my wife and I went camping with 3 friends from our gang. Unfortunately, one of them decided to bring along his poker set, and informed us that he was not going to let us sleep in peace in our tents unless we consent to learn and play poker with him. That's how it all started. As we picked up the nuances (read 'basic rules') of this game, we started getting into the spirit. Pairs elicited contented sighs while occasional straights were met with unabashed joy. As the sun disappeared and the camping ground was slowly getting enveloped in darkness, the stakes were getting upped at our table under a gas lantern. Fifty dollar chips were being thrown in nonchalantly. Granted, we just called the red chips 'fifty dollar chips', and we weren't really going to bring out any cash. But still, you could feel the sense of anticipation and thrill in the air. People started experimenting and finalizing on their poker expressions. I perfected the art of not letting away anything. When I got a good hand, I frowned. When I got a bad hand, I smiled. I was so unpredictable that it was enough to throw even experienced professionals off my scent. I'm not sure how I still lost so consistently. It was probably because I decided to show some style. Haven't you seen all those great poker scenes in moves where the protagonist is on his last dime and decides to bet everything he has on that last hand? The way the hero pushes the pile of chips saying "all in" must've made a serious impression on me. I've always wanted to do that. And here was my chance. Agreed, I only had a 5 pair, and there were bigger cards on the table. But the chance to be part of a 'movie moment' was too hard to resist and I did go all in. Unfortunately, my wife and poker-destroyer-in-chief was having an incredible run that night. She called my bluff pretty easily and added my measly donation to her considerable pile of chips. I would not want to get in the bad books of that woman when I' m sitting across from her on a poker table. She killed the competition that night, including that of our tutor ET.
When we came back from camping to resume our normal suburbian lives, I realized that the poker mania was here to stay. When we gathered at Ram's place on the eve of his b'day, we again decided to get a game of poker going. This time, my wife was in even better form. She was producing Aces and triplets like it was nobody's business. As for me, I couldn't seem to catch a break. I went maybe like 10 games without a half-decent hand. The only redeeming thing was that Ram went 'all in' this time and lost everything before me. On his b'day, no less. However, without the influence of alcohol (unlike the camping night), I actually got most of the rules straight. Like when I can 'check', how the bet matching works, what's a 'small blind' and a 'big blind' etc. (didn't I tell you its a complicated game?).
The following friday, we decided to have a formal poker night at my place. So we set the dining table up with enough seating space, stocked the fridge with enough alcohol to feed an army and opened the poker set for a night of gambling. We also had new arrivals, and we passed on our new-found knowledge of the game. There were a few hiccups before the game started. I was sitting on the floor with a bottle of beer talking to someone, and then I realized that our dog Oreo had spilled my beer bottle on the rug and had proceeded to lap up the contents with relish. And in a few minutes, the OH seemed to hit him. He looked totally out of it, roamed around drunk for a little bit and eventually just curled up under the poker table and went to sleep. We had to literally whack him over his head to wake him up next day morning. Not sure if he had a bad hangover, but he was not anywhere near his best the whole day. It goes without saying that my wife wasn't very happy with me. But the whole episode was hilarious, like something straight out of a comic book. Secretly, I was proud that Oreo infact liked beer. He was my boy after all :-)
Getting back to the game, there were experts and newbies fighting it out on the table. We decided to play with some money to make things interesting. Apparently, that's when people actually start using their brains, calculating odds etc. My wife, unfortunately, decided not to participate. My plans of getting back my $5 investment went down the drain. I played it safe knowing that every hand involved pennies, nickels, dimes and even a quarter or two. I didn't do anything flashy like going all in. It didn't matter. I got my ass whooped pretty quick. And before I knew it, I was the first one out of the game. Others followed. But the last 3 guys fought it out till 4AM despite my best attempts to kick them out of the house and get some sleep. Finally, the last 2 ended up splitting the handsome $30 pot.
That was last weekend. We haven't played poker since. I'm not sure where our gang will go from here as far as poker is concerned. Will we get bored of it and give it up just like we did other card/board games? Or will we get completely hooked on to it and make it a regular feature? I'm not sure. But I do know that we can't let the game can go on like that for hours. It becomes a torture especially for those who get kicked out early on in the game (ok, me). I'll probably vote to put in some sort of time limit, to make it fast and interesting. Also, I probably need to work on my poker expression and body language, seeing that whaterever I've done so far has not worked.
Ofcourse, the main thing to remember is this. Listen carefully because this is pretty deep. Poker is just like life. The wife is the boss and you are better off not messing with her.
posted by c2c at Monday, July 16, 2007
1 Comments:
I, my friend, will keep poker alive in the grp -)
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