Some advice for my brother!

My dear kid brother is leaving home this week for the first time in his 24 years on Earth. Yeah okay, he's no kid! More like a 'full-grown buffalo' as we lovingly refer to such types in Tamil. And I didn't mean like 'leaving home to shop' or something like that. Ofcourse, he's been away from home on vacations and such. What I meant was that he's going to be leaving home for an extended period of time - 2 years to be exact. He's going to be in Bangalore persuing his MTech. And I for one, cannot be any happier for him. Despite the home-cooking, free laundry and zero-rent policy at home, it does pay to leave home and see the world for yourself.

And who would be better qualified than me to comment on the topic? I haven't been home for the last 11 Diwalis, or the last 11 birthdays or the last 11 New Years. After my high school, I packed my bags and left home for good. Though I had a few regrets, I was really looking forward to the freedom and fun that a college/hostel combo promises. Ofcourse, I hadn't accounted for the prolonged periods of loneliness, bouts of regret and extensive self-analysis. In the end, I believe it makes you a better person. But ofcourse, I didn't know it at the time. And though I hated it at first, the tiny little village of Pilani ended up being my home away from home, and one of my most favorite places on earth.

So this would be the right time to share my wisdom with my bro and anyone else there looking for unsolicited, utterly redundant, self-conflicting and eventually destructive advice. Since everyone believes in making lists with rounded numbers (top 10, top 25 etc.), I'm going to make this a top 11 just so I can prove I can be different and daring! So without further ado, here goes in no particular order:

#1 Make a monthly budget, and try to stick to it. I mean 'try' because its almost always impossible to stick to a budget. My take is 'budgets are meant to be broken', particularly if you have your parents to take care of your deficits. But the effort still has to be made, or atleast the associated image has to be projected.

#2 Keep a sense of personal hygiene. Shower regularly (I mean everyday) and keep your socks and innerwear clean and smell-free. You might think of this as trivial, but I can assure you its not. I can't begin to describe how many good kids got left out of groups and looked down upon because their entry into a room was preceded by the stench of their footwear.

#3 Even though you will live only a bus-ride or train-ride away from home, avoid the temptation to visit home every weekend. Weekends are when you enjoy the true bliss of a bachelor/single life. You get to mingle, make new friends and to indulge in new activities (mind what you smoke though!). But once you start going home every weekend, you'll start living your hostel life from one home visit to another, and your colleagues will always be strangers to you.

#4 Never hesitate to spend money on books and food. When you have a new book, it gives you extra motivation to actually use it just so you get some value for the money. Its called the theory of 'sunk cost'. And though its a fallacy, its still a strong psychological motivator. And about the food part, you'll be in Bangalore dammit! Its the food haven of South India. Indulge yourself!

#5 Attend class regularly. Even if your school might not have a compulsory attendance policy. Remember you're paying good money to get these professors and facilities, and make sure you use them. One thing I repent about my BITS Pilani stint is the number of classes I missed sleeping or hanging out with friends, just because the college did not have an attendance requirement.

#6 Noone can teach you if you don't want to learn. Remember that old adage "You can take a pony to the pond, but you cannot make it drink"? Its very true. You should want to learn, if your brain needs to have any chance of absorbing all the stuff that gets dished out in a regular school day.

#7 Stay fit. Take time out to work out, run, play a few sports. In the land of pubs and fast food, this is extremely important. Ofcourse, poker or carrom at home over a few beers do not exactly qualify as an active sport. Neither do wine-tasting, girl-chasing or pub-hopping.

#8 Some essential stuff you should always have in your room - A good working alarm clock that will refuse to snooze and infact increase in volume everytime you try. Emergency money that should never be used except for, well, emergency. An audio system, mp3 player, or at the very least, a walkman (there will be times when you just gotta have some music!). And ofcourse, don't forget a picture of your elder brother ;-)

#9 Have fun. This is mandatory, but most people grossly underestimate the importance of this. However hard you need to work, you still have to take time out to have fun. Indulge in your passion, get a hobby, sit around with friends and chat about random topics, go watch a movie. Whatever tickles you. But make sure you allocate some time for fun each week.

#10 Don't be scared to self-introspect. Its amazing how much you can learn about yourself when you are alone for an extended period of time. You can actually hear yourself think without your mom yelling from the kitchen that your coffee is ready or your dad calling out for help with this car or the steady stream of Sun TV soap operas your grand parents watch.

#11 And finally - Be yourself. You are a good person. I like you this way. Don't change.