Marriages are made in heaven? Think again
There's a very interesting web-site called dontmarry.com that I came across a while ago. It consists of a single brilliantly written article that opened my eyes to the pitfalls of marriage and the various Doomsday conspiracies surrounding it. So whether you're a bachelor or a fool (they're both mutually exclusive, didn't you know?), this site makes for a great read. I know this is mainly targeted at bachelors in the western world, but a part of it is applicable to desis and NRIs as well.
Some of the arguments that the author makes against marriage are:
1. The cost of proclaiming your undying love: This includes the cost of the now customary diamond ring (will come to this soon!) and then the lavish wedding expenses.
2. Marriage can mean career slavery: How men are forced to labor like dogs, while the wives convert their temporary pregnancy breaks into lifelong never-leave-house-for-work vacations.
3. Even more unfair double standards that favor wives: This includes society's take on things like cheating, prenups and job losses as well as a general predisposition to consider men as "stupid" and "irresponsible" who are just sitting there waiting to be straightened by women.
4. Divorce: Alimony is unfairly loaded against men. It states that the earning partners should continue to provide for the same sort of lifestyle for their spouses after marriage. This unfortunately means that if you pamper your wife, this will be used aginst you later!
The author completes his essay debunking all the "classic" reasons why a man gets married myth. I know I sound totally like a male chauvinist (Can't I be the same to men that feminists are to women? I've never come across a word to indicate that!), so you're all welcome to take your potshots at me. I will still maintain that marriages in the western world are loaded heavily in favor of women.
What zapped me out most was the reference to the so-called "tradition" of diamond rings for engagements. Unfortunately, some of the links from the web-site do not work anymore, however, here's what wikipedia had to say on how De Beers has manipulated the "romance market" for its own good and also artificially fixed diamond prices. For the lazy ones, I'm going to quote from this:
Using its monopoly, De Beers has created an artificial scarcity of diamonds, thus keeping prices high. The modern tradition of diamonds as a part of engamenent in many cultures has been largely created by De Beers through an amazingly effective advertising campaign started in 1938. The "A Diamond is Forever" campaign not only convinced the public that the only suitable gift for engagement is a diamond, but also served to limit the market in used diamonds.
I was pretty terrified, and at the same time impressed, with how a single corporate entity can manipulate the collective psyche of the public at large and create a new pseudo tradition that we follow without question. Did you know that Macy's and similar department stores promoted the "custom" and the "joys" of everyone in the family exchanging christmas gifts with everyone else?
So I sat down to think about how else Corporate America could manipulate the public and introduce new 'customs' and 'cultures' in the future that would make them richer and lead us gullible public to contemplate bankruptcy and/or suicide. Here's my list, feel free to add to it:
1. A large tank of pepsi will become the traditional drink at Thanksgiving, along with the now customory turkey, mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce.
2. The year you turn 30, the Super Bowl game needs to be watched in a big screen TV (preferably a plasma 45 inches or bigger).
3. All church goers need to wear Nike shoes.
4. New Year calls can only be made on the AT&T telephone network or, in the worst case scenario, on Cingular wireless.
5. All gifts for a kid's one-year birthday should come from Babies r' Us or Toys r' Us.
6. Honeymoons should include a customary platinum navel piercing for the bride.
Will keep updating this list from your comments as well as from random sparks of genius I might get.
PS/Disclaimer: For those aunties that might consider giving me the hands of their daughters in the future, this article does not constitute my general opinion on women or marriage, and I was misled, nay manipulated, by the American media to take a stance against marriage.
PS to PS: I was forced to write this article by Budwiser (everyone knows bachelors are their best customers), Auto Insurance companies (single men pay higher insurance premiums inspite of being better drivers!), Mcdonalds (bachelors don't cook at home) and the Association of House Cleaning Ladies and Laundry service (self-explanatory).
Some of the arguments that the author makes against marriage are:
1. The cost of proclaiming your undying love: This includes the cost of the now customary diamond ring (will come to this soon!) and then the lavish wedding expenses.
2. Marriage can mean career slavery: How men are forced to labor like dogs, while the wives convert their temporary pregnancy breaks into lifelong never-leave-house-for-work vacations.
3. Even more unfair double standards that favor wives: This includes society's take on things like cheating, prenups and job losses as well as a general predisposition to consider men as "stupid" and "irresponsible" who are just sitting there waiting to be straightened by women.
4. Divorce: Alimony is unfairly loaded against men. It states that the earning partners should continue to provide for the same sort of lifestyle for their spouses after marriage. This unfortunately means that if you pamper your wife, this will be used aginst you later!
The author completes his essay debunking all the "classic" reasons why a man gets married myth. I know I sound totally like a male chauvinist (Can't I be the same to men that feminists are to women? I've never come across a word to indicate that!), so you're all welcome to take your potshots at me. I will still maintain that marriages in the western world are loaded heavily in favor of women.
What zapped me out most was the reference to the so-called "tradition" of diamond rings for engagements. Unfortunately, some of the links from the web-site do not work anymore, however, here's what wikipedia had to say on how De Beers has manipulated the "romance market" for its own good and also artificially fixed diamond prices. For the lazy ones, I'm going to quote from this:
Using its monopoly, De Beers has created an artificial scarcity of diamonds, thus keeping prices high. The modern tradition of diamonds as a part of engamenent in many cultures has been largely created by De Beers through an amazingly effective advertising campaign started in 1938. The "A Diamond is Forever" campaign not only convinced the public that the only suitable gift for engagement is a diamond, but also served to limit the market in used diamonds.
I was pretty terrified, and at the same time impressed, with how a single corporate entity can manipulate the collective psyche of the public at large and create a new pseudo tradition that we follow without question. Did you know that Macy's and similar department stores promoted the "custom" and the "joys" of everyone in the family exchanging christmas gifts with everyone else?
So I sat down to think about how else Corporate America could manipulate the public and introduce new 'customs' and 'cultures' in the future that would make them richer and lead us gullible public to contemplate bankruptcy and/or suicide. Here's my list, feel free to add to it:
1. A large tank of pepsi will become the traditional drink at Thanksgiving, along with the now customory turkey, mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce.
2. The year you turn 30, the Super Bowl game needs to be watched in a big screen TV (preferably a plasma 45 inches or bigger).
3. All church goers need to wear Nike shoes.
4. New Year calls can only be made on the AT&T telephone network or, in the worst case scenario, on Cingular wireless.
5. All gifts for a kid's one-year birthday should come from Babies r' Us or Toys r' Us.
6. Honeymoons should include a customary platinum navel piercing for the bride.
Will keep updating this list from your comments as well as from random sparks of genius I might get.
PS/Disclaimer: For those aunties that might consider giving me the hands of their daughters in the future, this article does not constitute my general opinion on women or marriage, and I was misled, nay manipulated, by the American media to take a stance against marriage.
PS to PS: I was forced to write this article by Budwiser (everyone knows bachelors are their best customers), Auto Insurance companies (single men pay higher insurance premiums inspite of being better drivers!), Mcdonalds (bachelors don't cook at home) and the Association of House Cleaning Ladies and Laundry service (self-explanatory).
posted by c2c at Tuesday, April 04, 2006
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